


Whenever and Wherever (However Possible)

by jantolover



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005), Sherlock (TV), Supernatural, Torchwood
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Angst, Crack, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Genderbending, M/M, Superwholock, racebend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-25
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:28:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 6,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24908410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jantolover/pseuds/jantolover
Summary: Against his brother's and his own husband's countless warnings, Dean Winchester performs an unusual spell that transports him into many alternate universes. Sam and Castiel Winchester dive in after him. Trying to find Dean and return to their universe isn't the only problem, though. Dean used a little too much will power and dragged in a "high functioning sociopath" and his blogger, a mysterious blonde woman who goes by "the Doctor" and her "team", and an organization full of misfits called Torchwood.
Relationships: Castiel & Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Gabriel & Sam Winchester, Gabriel/Sam Winchester, Jack Harkness & Ianto Jones, Jack Harkness/Ianto Jones, Sherlock Holmes & John Watson, Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, The Doctor/Yasmin Khan, Thirteenth Doctor & Yasmin Khan, Thirteenth Doctor/Yasmin Khan
Comments: 2
Kudos: 15





	1. Books! Dean Winchester Never Really Stopped Loving Books!

"This is a bad idea, Dean. We should at least know what kind of spell book it is".  
Dean Winchester waves off his brother. "We have tons of spell books, Sammy, this shouldn't be any different".  
"Dean, Sam is right".  
Dean wrinkles his nose, but does not look up at his husband. Instead, the hunter continues to scan the old and tattered book Sam found. He showed his older brother who was immediately intrigued by yellowed and tattered thing. The leather and mildew smell very poignant.  
"Why are you so interested in the smelly book, Dean?" the formal angel cocks his head.  
Dean chuckles at the adorable dork. "I don't know, Babe. I just think it's really cool". He has not looked up since he found it.  
The other Winchesters share a worried look.  
"Dean, do you want to go watch a movie?" tests Cas. " 'The Terminator'? 'Porkies'?"  
"No, I want to read this. Did you know merpeople can reproduce homosexually? I didn't even know they had... you know, baby- making things".  
"Really, Dean? 'Baby- making things'?"  
Dean doesn't acknowledge his brother.  
'No dirty look? Not even the finger? Okay, this isn't right'.  
Sam looks at his brother-in-law and can tell he's thinking the same thing.  
Cas walks up behind Dean and slips his arms around Dean's waist.  
He puts his lips next to his ear... Then his tongue in it. Sam immediately looks away- he's obviously talking dirty and slipping in Enochian to snap him out of it. Sam is really happy he can't hear.  
Cas gives up and takes Sam's wrist. He drags him to the bathroom- a funny sight; 5′ 11″ Castiel dragging 6′ 4″ Sam- and shuts the door.  
"This is scary".  
"Cas, it's probably nothing. He's just excited about finding the new journal."  
"Sam, when is it ever 'nothing'? We are not that lucky".  
"Okay, but everything always turns out alright with us. If it is something, we'll just kill it".  
Cas looks away and nods, his muscles visibly slacking. "You're right, thank you".  
The two snap their heads up as they hear a loud and weird noise coming from the living room - where they left Dean. The two pause for only a moment to see Dean enter a multi- colored portal.

Panic and anger immediately shroud the men left in the library, but only for a second. They dive headfirst after him.


	2. Toto, I Have a Feeling We're Not in Kansas Anymore

Pain shoots through Dean's side as he lands hard on the ground. "Sammy?"

"Yeah?"

"Cas?"

"Here. Dean, _what the hell_ was that?"

"I don't know. I was so deep into the book, and I don't know why. Speaking of which..." He looks behind him and grabs the journal. "I think this thing is cursed".

"Great job, Sherlock. You solved the case".

Dean flips his brother off. He looks around. "Well, Toto, I have a feeling we're in Kansas anymore".

Sam stands up and helps Dean. "Then where the hell are we, Dorothy?"

Dean looks around. "London?"

"Baker Street to be exact" adds Cas. He looks around some more. "Sam, in those Sherlock Holmes books you made me read, didn't he live on 221B Baker Street with John Watson?"

"Yeah Cas, why?"

He points in front of him. "Like that 221B?" 

👽👽👽👽

"Has this ever happened before, Doc?" 

"Well, once or twice, Graham. Or ten. Actually, a lot of the time". The Doctor scratches her blonde head and makes that scronch in her face her girlfriend loves so much.

"So that means you know how to stop it?" she asks. "No, Yas. This is... new. But, I'm figuring it out like I always do. I _allllways_ find a way".

Her companions see through her bravado. Yas slides her hand up the Doctor's arm. The Doctor immediately stops and looks at her. "Baby, what is it?"

The Doctor chews her cheek. "I don't know. There's something... _supernatural_ happening and the TARDIS doesn't like it".

Team TARDIS looks past the fourth wall at the reader(s).

"... And I don't know... anything" the Doctor fixes her focus back into the whoniverse. "I don't know how to stop it, what it is, where it came from..."

The four are suddenly launched as the TARDIS jerks to the right. The Doctor grabs onto the railings, Yas and Graham grab onto edges of the control panel... and Ryan slams hard into the door. Ouch.

The Doctor quickly inspects the screens and her face falls. "Oh-"

💩💩💩💩

"-great, Sherlock. Just great".

"What, John? Please don't be flustered, it's still me. Nothing is different".

" _It is to me!_ And why would you think I'm angry?"

"Well, for one you're wrong. You're in a state of unease. Two, you have a war inside your head... You're not frustrated at me, you're wondering if you noticed some things in the past and are frustrated with yourself for not being able to identify it earlier. But then you're going back to you never noticed anything at all, and the bantering continues".

John Watson stops pacing his and Sherlock Holmes's apartment. He relaxes a little. "It's scary how you do that sometimes... But, why now? Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

Sherlock shrugs. "In my defense, I didn't mean to just blurt out 'I'm so in love with you'. It was in the heat of the argument".

John almost sits on the coffee table, but realises how annoyed that would make Sherlock and crouches down next to his chair. Sherlock immediately looks away in unease of the closeness.

"But Irene Adler-?"

"Is gay, like me. Which you already knew. She was teasing me. You know, I'm gay, she's gay, it would never happen. It's just a running joke".

John nods. "Sherlock, look at me". He does. "This doesn't change anything about you. Not one thing".

The detective smiles.

John looks away.

"What are you thinking?"

"Does anyone else know?"

Sherlock inhales and folds his fingers. "Mycroft".

John nods again. "Mate, I love you. Maybe not in the same way, but I do. Is there anything else you need off your chest?"

"I'm asexual".

"...What?"

"I experience no..." He swirls his finger. "Physical sexual attraction. Sex is gross and I cannot think of myself in that kind of situation".

"Alright".

"Alright?"

"Yes" John smiles. "You are you, Sherlock. It's perfectly alright. All the shit we've been through, and you think that's going to bother me? And if I was not okay with it, may time and space be ripped apart!"

And of course, that's what happens.


	3. Demons, and Aliens, and Criminals, Oh my!

"What the hell is going on?"  
"Well, 'ghost hunter', I am having the queerest dream ever".  
Dean nits his eyebrows at Sherlock. "Are you saying you've had orgy dreams with-?"  
"NO! God, gross!"  
John hides his knowing chuckle.  
"It means strange, unusual, supernatural".  
"And so you're John Watson?"  
John gives a questioning look at Dean. "How do you know that?"  
"Are you kidding?" Sam pulls a chair next to him. "John Hamish Watson and William Sherlock Scott Holmes". He sits on the chair backwards.

  
"Holmes, you are one of the most famous literary icons. _Everyone_ knows who you are. Hell, you're used as a verb".  
Sherlock gives him a confused look.  
"People refer to geniuses as you. And a famous phrase is 'no shit, Sherlock' in response to gimme statements".  
"People... like me?"  
"Hell, people love you!"  
John has a huge smile that a dumbfounded Sherlock cannot see.   
"Okay, you said you were an alien?" Dean turns to the Doctor.  
"Yes".  
"From Mars?"  
"Gallifrey".  
"And who are these people?"  
"I'm Graham".  
"Ryan".  
"Yasmin, but you could also call me Yas".  
"And are you four...?" Dean trails off .  
Graham answers him. "Yes".  
"No!" the others say in unison.  
"Graham, he meant, like..." Yas tumbles her pointer fingers.  
"Oh... _Oh_!" He gives Dean a grossed- out look. "Ew. That's my grandson," he points at Ryan, "and they're _lesssbians_ " at the Doctor and Yas.   
The ' _lesssbians'_ share a look and bust out laughing.   
"And where are you three from?" Yas points three fingers at the hunters after collecting herself.  
"We're brothers from Lawrence, Kansas and this is my husband who was an angel from heaven, but became mortal. We hunt things".  
"What things?" the Doctor asks, anger starting to boil.   
"Monsters".  
"Monsters?"  
"Yes" Cas speaks up. "Demons, ghosts, witches, faeries, anything you can think of".  
"And you _kill_ them?"  
"Only the bad ones, Doctor. The ones beyond hope".  
The Doctor seems to relax, but anger still boils in her.  
Sherlock laughs.  
"What are you laughing at, _Adrian Monk_?"  
"Well, Dean Winchester, the 'Hunter', this is the weirdest dream I have ever had and I can't wait to wake up, so I can tell John how funny it is".  
"Sherlock, I'm afraid this is true".  
The detective smiles downwards and shakes his head.  
John slaps him across his face. Sherlock is frozen for a moment then looks at him.  
"You would have woken up from that".  
Sherlock rubs his cheek. "Alright then, the hell's going on?"  
Sam stands up. "There's something my brother needs to explain".


	4. Are you Kidding me?

"No, I'm afraid I'm not, alien".

"I told you my name is the Doctor. You know what, Dean Winchester? I have met some really, _really_ thick people in all my three thousand plus years, but you're really up there!"

"I don't care _who the hell_ you are, nor _what_ you are, Doctor! Me and Sam are the only ones who can call each other fat!"

The Doctor tilts her head and squints her eyes.

Cas puts his hand on Dean's shoulder. "She means thick- skulled, Dean. If you're skull's thick, you have a small brain".

"Oh..." he says. A moment later , when he's all caught up, "Ass hole! You think you're so high and mighty because you're frickin' old as balls! But you haven't let me explain, _bitch_. I was cursed! That book is poisoned!"

Yas steps in between them. "Don't you _ever_ talk to my girlfriend like that!"

"Guys, girls... Alien" Sam interjects, "something's not right".

"I am a woman, Point Break! And I am not all that different from you, just because I'm not of this world, nor dimension!"

"You're right. Please forgive me, Doctor".

Dean takes a breath. "Okay, what do you mean by 'not right', Sammy?"

Sam doesn't answer Dean- instead he picks up the cursed book Dean found.

They all huddle around them.

Sam looks up. "Come on, personal space. You can ask my brother and his husband all about it".

Sherlock looks at Cas and Dean.

Dean shakes his head. "Inside joke".

" _Anyway_ , look at the page" Sam says.

The other nine try to squeeze in- screw personal space.

"What _is_ that?" Sherlock points at something in the book.

Sam runs his thumb over a strange circular symbol.

The lights in 221B start flickering and they all look up at them.

  
Cas looks at Sherlock. "Where's your salt?"

No answer. Cas grabs his face. "Where. Is. Your -"

The Winchester is interrupted by a dizzying sensation. He tries to shake himself out of it to no prevail.

"Dean?"

"I feel it-" Dean slurs the words, but cannot get all of them out. Everything goes dark as the ten go down.


	5. Good Gracious, Get Gabriel!

_**Dean Winchester's POV**_  
Dizziness overtakes me and I land on my ass. After a few seconds, it passes and I stand back up.  
"Sammy, Cas!" I call out. I wait a few seconds, but there's no response.  
I start to walk around. Where the hell am I? What the hell happened?   
I look around to see if I can get to the Doctor. She's the smartest out of all of us, so she could probably figure out how to get us all back.   
'What happened? What happened?' I try to remember. 'Oh my Chuck! That damned book!'  
"Alright, Winchester" I say out loud. "Think. Think. Think."  
An idea pops into my head. 'Can't do that, I don't have the stuff to summon Balthazar. Cas is human. _There's no way I'm asking Michael._ Not Crowley nor Rowena. Nope, no demons. I'm not asking God, he'd probably say 'I'm busy writing my book'. So that only leaves...  
"Oh please, Chuck, no" I say out loud. I sigh. What other choice do I have?  
I close my eyes and pray. "Gabriel, it's Dean. Listen, man: I know I haven't been the best brother-in-law, but I really need you right now. Sam found a book a few hours ago after we ganked some witches. It was cursed and had an appeal to me- I was almost making out with it. Anyway, we found a symbol on the book. When Sam rubbed his finger over it, we were transported to Sherlock Holmes's apartment. We met an alien who calls herself the Doctor and-"  
"Where is he?"  
I turn around to see the short, dirty blonde archangel. 

  
"I don't now, that's why I called for you".  
He poofs away. As much as I hate to admit it, I kinda like him. And I really approve him with Sammy... You ever tell him I said that, I will rip your lungs out through your nose- slowly.  
He poofs back. "We're in an alternative dimension. That book that enchanted you? Had a sigil on it that when you touch it, you are transported to an alternative dimension. And then another, and another, and another, and so on until the person is dead. You need to find that book, and Sam needs to touch it again. I don't know where he is, but I think I know someone who could figure that out".  
I lift an eyebrow. "Who?"

 _ **Rex Matheson's POV**_  
I hit the head of the weevil target 100% of the time. Target practice usually relaxes me, but not tonight. Something's wrong, I can feel it.  
"Can't sleep?"  
I set my gun down and take off the headphones before turning to my boss who's leaning on the door frame. "There's a thing".  
" 'A _thing'_?"  
"A thing. I don't know what, Jack, but _something's not right"._  
"I actually came to tell you to come here".  
"Where's 'here'?"  
"Just come on".  
I follow Captain Jack Harkness through the halls. He takes me to the main room of the base. He sits at a computer and points.

  
"What is it?"  
"Rift activity. In multiple areas. Far away from each other, weird. And it's _different_. Nothing I have ever seen before.  
"Boss, maybe it's something else?"  
"But what?"  
"Hello Torchwood".  
We turn around to see a short winged man and a taller man in plaid.  
"What are you?" I ask.  
"Currently, mentally undressing your friend" says the intruder.  
Jack chuckles flirtatiously.   
I roll my eyes. "Where are you from?"  
"I'm an angel of the Lord, Rex Matheson. Where do you think I got these?" he flashes his wings.

  
I look at Jack to see if I'm not the only one going loony. "Do you believe this?"  
"No. He's just a _really_ hot individual from a species we haven't come across".  
"I'm married, Javic Piotr Thane".   
Jack's face drops. "You've been spying-"  
"No, Captain". The 'angel' poofs in front of him- they're about two inches away. "I told you, I'm an angel of the Lord".  
"You may be extremely hot, and you may have some cool toys, but that's not going to get you anywhere, Goldilocks. Now, what planet are you from, and what do you want with this one? And bare in mind, we don't hesitate to kill".

The "angel" rolls his eyes. He touches our foreheads with three fingers each. 

"Okay, I believe you" Jack says as the information Gabriel just gave us settles. "The Doctor's a woman?"  
I turn to him. "Seriously? We're about to meet Sherlock Holmes and John Watson and you're freaking out that the Doctor's a woman?"  
"I'm not freaking out, I'm just-"  
"Okay, okay. We have more important matters to attend to" Gabriel interrupts.  
He snaps his fingers. 

  
**_Ryan Sinclair's_ ** **_POV_ **

"Alright, so, who are you?" I ask.  
The short blonde guy snaps his fingers again.   
"Alright then. Doctor, is this the same Captain Jack from Torchwood?"  
"Yes, Ryan".  
"Down to business, alright?" Gabriel says. "Dean found a cursed book and touched a symbol on it. That symbol was a portal a witch named Drahm made to enter any universe he wanted to... I thought it was destroyed. Anyway, if we don't get everyone to their universes, all of time and space will be ripped apart. And we can't sew it back together".  
"So how do we fix everything?" Sherlock asks.  
Gabriel pauses. "You're not going to like this: we have to go through portal after portal and hope for the best".  
"Why can't you just snap everything back? Why can't you snap us back to our homes?" the Doctor asks.  
"This magic is too powerful for even God. I could snap until my fingers fall off," Gabriel snap a few times, "but nothing will happen".  
John claps his hands together and rubs them. "So let's get started".  
Sherlock puts his hand on John's shoulder and says "this is insane. And I know insane. We can't do this, there's _got to be_ another way".  
"Really?" I ask sarcastically . "And what's that?"   
He falls silent.   
"We're following the angel" Yas says.

<https://tardis.fandom.com/wiki/Jack_Harkness>

_I searched a long time for Cpt Jack's real name. This is where I found it. I also saw it on other websites, but I exited out of them. -yoloithinknot_


	6. That Mötley Crüe Song

<https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nZSg87Z0Dh4>

At least Sam didn't pass out this time. But you don't have the after taste of vomit when you pass out. He looks around to see a short woman looking at him. "Who are you?"

He puts his hand to his mouth, to his smaller and thicker lips. Sam looks at his smaller hand which causes his arm to brush his considerably larger breast. 'Oh great' he thinks. Sam runs her fingers through her hair- it hasn't grown... She looks at the short woman again. "Gabe?"

She shakes her head. "John".

Sam gets up from her nees- holding up her pants. "It's just us? A couple of girls?"

"Women".

"...What's the difference?"

"Women are grown up, girls are pre- pubescent".

Sam nods. She lets go of her pants and they droop mid- thigh. She tries not to dwell on the fact that there's more room in the front of her underwear.

John chuckles. She takes off her belt. "Take this, my hips are wider now, anyway".

Sam shyly smile a thanks. "So it's just us girls?" she asks.

"So far".

"Alright, John, listen" Sam say as she fasten the belt around her waist. "I don't know if you've noticed, but your friend has it for you, _bad_ ".

John pauses. She looks blankly at the hunter. "What?"

"Sherlock is in love with you. Like, _really_ in love with you".

"No, no, no. He- she...? Sherlock sees me as a brother. There's no way".

"Dean said that about Castiel for many years, but now look at them... And I think you reciprocate those emotions".

John looks up at Sam. She opens and closes her mouth a few times. "I'm not gay".

"There are many more sexualities than gay and strait".

"Sam, I'm strait".

"Ok... But I think you should know I am, too".

John furrows her eyebrows. "What about that Gabe you thought I was? You said his name and had a face when people talk about their s/o".

Sam folds her fingers, inhale, and looks up. "I feel in love with Gabriel because of his personality" she looks back at her. "Gabriel is hilarious, he protects me, he's strong- really strong. He's a huge foodie, especially for sweets, which is kinda funny- he doesn't gain the weight at all. He's very good to me. He puts himself in danger for me-"

"So he's just like your brother?" John interrupts.

Sam moves her eyes to the right for a second. "No, no, he's not like Dean".

John frowns- not believing her.

"Anyway, you are head over heels with Sherlock. He's the one who's always there for you, you are the most important thing in his life, he has risked his life on multiple occasions-"

"Alright, I know- they're my feelings" John interrupts with a sad smile. "But I don't think I'm going to be able to tell him when I'm dead".

Sam sits next to her. "Where are we, anyway?"

"Not where we're supposed to be".

"Watson, look at me".

She does.

"We're going to get out of here, I promise. We're going to find the other eight, that book, and a way to get everyone home". She smiles. "And maybe when you two get back to 221B, you can... make your relationship official" Sam wiggles her eyebrows.

John chuckles and looks down, shaking her head. "I think it's time look for the others".

Sam nods and stands up. "I don't think we should split up, the desert is a bad place to get lost".

"The desert?" Sure enough, Sam looks around and sees it. "Great. I bet the Doctor and Dean are in a frickin' ocean".

⭐⭐⭐⭐

The Doctor and Dean were not in a frickin' ocean. Hell, they weren't even in their original bodies. 

"Would you please stop that?" The Doctor asks Dean- who's rubbing her breast.

"I have _boobs_ , Doc!"

"I'm not blind. Yes, I understand how weird it is to become a female, but I would like to focus so I can turn back into one, okay?"

Dean drops her hands. "You're right. But I wanna know where the hell we are first".

"A desert".

"... I'v got that, yes, but I want to know what desert and how are we going to figure that out?!" 

"My TARDIS".

Uh oh. "Right, your spaceship. Time and relative dimension in space. Why didn't you do that earlier?"

" _Because of your spell_ , my TARDIS went all looney. I'm scared to see what happened to it".

"That doesn't matter right now, Doctor. We have to try".

"Alright..." he pulls out his sonic screwdriver. He presses the button and the two wait.

[ ](https://www.amazon.com/photos/shared/D4MqhT4eQEi7LL723dJVMw.WMUJxr3jS6WxO74aWlF52Q)


	7. Phantom Traveler

"Nope, nope. I'm not getting in, Doctor".  
"Dean, come on. I told you, it's bigger in the inside".  
"Don't care".  
"Then what are you going to do? Call Chuck? The TARDIS can fix us-"  
"I know that, Blondie, but I ain't getting in there".  
Sam grabs both of her shoulders. "Fine, Dean. Please tell me your brilliant idea to return us all back into our original bodies, and get us home" she releases her and crosses her arms over her much larger and softer breast. "Go ahead, I'll wait".  
Dean looks away. She gives her sister a long sigh and points at her- still not looking. "If I die again, I'm gonna kill you".  
⭐⭐⭐⭐  
"What's that?" John points with his real finger.  
"A stabilizer" the Doctor answers.  
"How about that?"   
"Something that goes _woosh_ ".  
"And that?"  
"Why don't you ask Sherlock that thing?"  
John looks up at Sam and the Doctor smiles a 'thank you'. He shifts his eyes to the detective who's talking to a freaking- out Dean.   
"He seems to be preoccupied with your brother".  
"He's going to be a bit more _preoccupied_ with you later on" Sam wiggles his eyebrows.  
John playfully slaps his arm and laughs. "I want it to be perfect - us becoming a thing. A romantic scene, you know?"  
"Like wine, rose petals, smooth music, and then you raw each other to a numb?"  
John looks up at Sam with his lips pursed. "You know he's asexual, don't you?"  
"A blind person could see it".  
The three laugh.  
⭐⭐⭐⭐  
 _"No"._  
"Dean it's completely safe, I trust the Doctor with my life".  
" _You're sleeping with her_ , of course you trust her! I'm not sleeping with her, and I'm not letting go! I mean, what if we crash, Yasmin?"  
"We won't" the Doctor says, hoping for it to be true.  
"Dean, the Doctor has been doing this for eleven hundred years" his brother brother-in-law assures him. "I could use my grace-"  
"No. No angel mojo".  
"Doctor" Castiel makes the Time Lady jump.   
"Eleven years of that, Doc".  
Cas rolls his eyes at his husband. "You're just jealous I'm behind someone else, you little slut".  
 _"Hey, hey!"_  
Captain Jack laughs.  
"Anyway," the Doctor laughs and turns around "what is it, Castiel?"  
"Your screen is flashing 'Anomaly Detected' ".  
Dean's grip tightens. The Doctor's face drops and she runs to the screen. She pulls the others in front of her and scans them hurriedly. "Oh, shit!"

  
"What?" Gabriel asks.  
"This freakier freaky Friday is not over with".  
"What does that mean?" John asks.  
"It means" Gabe turns on his heels to him "we're still under that spell".  
"Speak of the Devil" Rex sways and passes out. His boss follows him and the others go down like dominos.

' _Phantom Traveler' was where we first found out Dean Winchester is terrified of flying, but you probably knew that. Credit to the writers. -jantolover_


	8. Back in Black

" _Motherfucker_! Load of shit! Dumb ass _bitch_ \- !"  
"Cursing doesn't help, Bro".  
"It helps me, Gabriel" Dean says with more snarl in his voice than usual .   
"Well, at least we are all together this time" a Vietnamese Ryan says.   
Dean walks up to him with his hands up. "We're all a different race than we were before".  
"Dude, it's just skin. You gotta problem with being black?"  
Dean's heart sinks. " _No, no, no_ , Ryan. I'm just- I... Um..."  
"Dude, I'm just busting your balls. I want to turn back, too".  
Dean gives a relieved chuckle.  
"Alright then" an Islamic Doctor starts "TARDIS didn't work, back to finding the book".   
"This is what all the fuss is about?" A white Yas asks rhetorically while looking at and feeling her new skin. "Oh wow, I'm _so_ different now" she says sarcastically.   
Most of them look at her with a confused look.   
"I'm white now? White people have been racist towards me my whole life? Well, and blacks, Natives, Chinese-"  
The Doctor puts her hand in her girlfriend's. Saying nothing, but also saying so much. Yas smiles and kisses her.

  
"You are the most beautiful woman in all of time and space". The Doctor puts her hands under her girlfriend's shirt and rubs her back. "You're skin is gorgeous... I mean, your real skin. Not that your skin isn't gorgeous now. I just-"  
"I know what you mean, Babe".  
"... Anybody who can not see that, is thicker than a brick".   
Yas smiles and kisses her again.  
A black Captain Jack clears his throat. "Although this is a very heart- felt moment, can we get back to finding that book, please?"  
The Doctor pulls away. "Captain's rite".  
"Wait, what? ...I don't think you've ever said that before" Jack starts. He pulls out his phone. "Could you repeat that?"  
The Doctor rolls her eyes and pushes his hand away. "Oh, come on, we have universes to fix".


	9. His Heaven

"It's Gwen, right?"

"Your brother-in-law used his... toys to give you that information, why ask?"

"Just trying to make conversation" Dean says as he ducks under a branch in the woods. What woods? Don't ask, I don't know, and neither do they. A few minutes pass with them dragging the flashlights everywhere. 

"Alright, but I'm pretty sure we can go past awkward small talk, Dean".

"Mmmm...How about hunting?" Gwen Cooper gives him a weird look.

"Hunting?"

"Well, if you think about it, you do hunt. You guys-" a branch smacks him in the face and stops him. Gwen stifles a laugh. " -protect humans, aliens, and creatures from other humans, aliens, and creatures" Dean finishes and rubs the dirt and pain away.

"But we don't have loads of information on the creatures in books".

"You've got to give me something, Cooper".

She looks at him for a second.

"Alright then, where did you meet Castiel?"

Dean sticks his bottom lip up (which Gwen can't see). "Hell, actually. He saved me".

"Aw. May I ask what you were going through?"

"... Hell, I was going through literal hell".

"Oh... Right, he was an angel. So he raised you?"

"Yes. What about you? I kinda got a feeling of sexual tension between you and Jack. Anything-?"

"Oh no, no. I'm married. Reese".

Dean chuckles. "I was married to pie before I was married to Cas. Still am, actually".

Gwen laughs. "Reese. Like Reese Witherspoon?"

"Ah... Not that I'm interested, but is Jack with Rex?"

"Oh no. Jack hasn't really been with anyone besides shagging people since Ianto".

"Ianto?"

"Oh, um.... He was the receptionist years ago. He fell in love with Jack because he reminded him so much of his late girlfriend, Lisa".

Dean smiles sadly at the name. "So they were boyfriends?"

"No. Just fuck buddies".

"Jack never tell in love with Ianto?"

"It was pretty obvious he did right before Ianto died".

"Oh. Could I ask how he died?"

Gwen tells him. About the 456, about Jack's grandson, and about Ianto.

"That's terrible" Dean says.

"Yeah. Jack's never really been the same".

"Oh?"

"Yeah. I mean he doesn't mention him, but he has this certain face when he's reminded of him. He's... different now". There's a pause. The only sound is the leaves crunching under their feet. "Hey Dean?"

"Hm?"

"So you deal with ghost, right? Have you ever, like, summoned one?"

Dean stops and Gwen almost walks into him.

He turns to face her.

"Summoning ghosts is always a bad idea. You're opening something up that you may never be able to close. And we don't know for sure if it's Ianto we're talking to".

"How 'bout we get one of your in-laws?"

Dean stops. "Oh my Chuck, I forgot about Gabriel!"

"How do we sum-"

"Gabriel!" Dean interrupts. "Man, I don't know what happened to you, but we still need you!" They wait for a few moments. "GABRIEL! PLE-!"

"Like I said before, you don't need to yell, Bro". Dean turns around. "Where are we?"

Gabriel licks his lollipop. "In a woods?"

"Seriously".

"The Amazon Rainforest; aka: the biggest forest in the world".

"Why? Why specifically these universes?" Gwen asks.

"Dean resealed that sigil". Dean just gives the angel a weird look as he licks the sucker. Gabriel rolls his eyes. "On the page you last looked at before this 'Bill and Ted's Suck- Ass Adventure'? That sigil you touched caused this TV Land. Sam needs to-"

"Touch it and we'll all be back" Gwen interrupts. "Yeah, you said that. But it's kind of hard when we have NO FUCKING IDEA WHERE THE BLOODY BOOK IS!"

Gabriel doesn't even flinch. He raises his right hand, palm out. "Rude. I don't appreciate your tone, Cooper".

She sighs. "You're right, I'm sorry. Why don't we get to the real reason we asked for you?"

Gabriel frowns. "Which is not to help you get out of this?"

She shakes her head. "It's Ianto".

"What about him, Coop?"

"We want you to bring him back".

"Lazarus? No way".

"Then is there a way to bring his spirit back without any dangers and/ or risks?"

The shorter Winchester crosses his arms over his chest. He pops the sucker in his mouth for a second. "He will roam until the Rapture, where he will be returned Home. Or until he decides he wants to go back Home".

Gwen smiles. "He's in Heaven?"

"Of course. His Heaven".

Gwen gives him a confused look.

"Everyone has their own unique Heaven" Dean says.

"You're part of his" Gabriel adds.

Gwen feels like she may cry. Shit, the tears start streaming down her cheeks. Gabriel wipes them away.

"Why? He barely talked to me!"

"Yes, but Ianto was quiet, right?"

"Well, yeah. But I didn't think... Anyway, you'll do it?"

"... Yes. I'll bring Ianto Jones back. But, only if he wants to full- heartedly". Gwen hides her smile with pray hands for a second. She wipes her tears.

"Before you go, my dad. What's his Heaven like?"


	10. The Fisher- Price Room

The Doctor's hearts were beating so fast, she was terrified they were going to give on her. Which is when her left one does. She drops to her knees- oblivious to the pain in them and more aware of the pain in her chest. She hears the terrible cry of the... _thing_ that's chasing her.   
"All right, we're doing this half- heartedly" she laughs out loud... alone. "Oh shit, the huge wibbly" she says- remembering the thing chasing her.  
So she runs. And runs. And runs. 'I might have to regenerate today' she thinks. Which is when she runs into Sherlock. No, you don't understand- she literally runs into him.  
"Woah there, I don't swing that way" he says after she falls in him.   
"Neither do I, Detective" she gets up basically pulls him along with her.  
"Why are we running!?" he yells/ asks.  
"We're being chased!"  
"Then _why are we running_!?"  
The Doctor stops. 'You're right' she thinks. She turns to him and smiles. "It's going to get us. _It will catch up._ It's probably going to kill us!" She laughs.

  
Sherlock moves to a closed stance. "What?"  
"It's going to kill us!" she laughs.   
Sherlock stares for a second, but he smiles at the hybrid. "You're right!" he starts laughing.

"So why are we worried!?"  
"I don't know!"  
"Me either!"  
The laughter slowly dies down.   
The geniuses clasps their own hands together in unison. "Now how do we stop it?"  
⭐⭐⭐⭐  
Rex Matheson is old. _Dirt old_. Since the transfusion of his blood with Jack's, he's been immortal. Stuck with the gayest pansexual _ever_ forever. Rex got used to and eventually was completely okay with the community. You meet some amazing people- human or no- when you're immortal and come back in different years, lives, even genders. Hell, he's had lesbian relationships (if you ask him, he'll tell you he doesn't mind being a woman. It's not that different from being a man. Not black or white, but just grey). Those aren't that bad. BUT THIS WHOLE SHIT- HOLE WAS BAD! Fucking spell book!   
"You're scowling again" Rex's thoughts are interrupted.   
"Yeah, I do that a lot" he tells Graham.   
Silence. The longest silence. Older than _the_ Silence.   
Rex starts banging his head against the plastic wall of the small, door- less room. Plastic like 'Fisher-Price' toys. Nowhere in, nowhere out.  
"This has been the longest I have been in one universe" Graham says.   
Rex starts. He lifts his head. "You're right".  
Graham looks at him. "And that's weird".  
"This whole experience isn't weird?"  
"Well yeah, but we've been in every universe about the same amount of time".  
Rex's eyes widen. "Maybe we're stuck in this universe? Maybe this is where we all end up and we eventually...?" He trails off. "But Jack and I aren't going to die, we can't".  
"No, you can. You just don't stay dead".  
Rex shoots a bullet from a finger gun at Graham. His face falls and he stands up. Graham's eyes follow him. "Maybe this is our way out?"  
Graham stands up.They look at each other for a second, then pick opposite sides and bash then in. Kicking, punching, slapping, pushing- looking desperately for the accursed book that drove them all into this 'Quantum Leap'.   
And then there it was, the witch's book.   
Rex nearly kisses it, but he doesn't want to end up in Egypt 321 BC with blonde pig tails. Ah, what the hell?   
Graham gives Rex an un- seen weird look.  
The immortal flips through the book, touching every little letter, every punctuation mark. Graham joins him and molests it, their hands overlapping occasionally. Finally, the men hear a familiar sound. Rex looks to his right and sees the same portal open up. 

He smiles at Graham, who doesn't look back- he just jumps through immediately. Rex literally trips over his own feet, but manages to fall into the portal.


	11. Life is Short

"Wait, Babe. Before you throw it in..." Cas grabs his husband's arm. He grabs the journal from him.

"Cas, what are you-?" Dean cuts himself off as his husband rips the accursed thing to shreds.

Cas gives him the shreds.

"Why didn't you just throw it in?"

"Life is short, and it was fun" is his answer.

Without anymore questions, Dean throws the pieces in the flames.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

Everything was quite. The only sound throughout the entire TARDIS was breathing and the space ship's quiet noises.

'What are you doing?' the Doctor thinks. 'You're going to get her killed! If not killed, then you're going to ruin her life!' Yas mutters something in her sleep and turns towards her girlfriend. She nuzzles into her neck.

'Then again' the Doctor thinks, 'life is short'.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

"But, Sherlock, you said you were asexual?"

"You said you weren't attracted to men".

John sticks up his bottom lip.

"Look Darling, I love you so much -"

"And I love you, too," John interrupts his new boyfriend, "but you don't have to put yourself through something that makes you uncomfortable".

Sherlock smiles. "You're right". He kisses him. "But life is short". He pushes him down on the bed with immediately hardens John.

He kisses his neck and collarbone. His hands explore John's hair, then lower to his neck. Even lower to his breasts. And finally- "John?" 

"Yes, love?"

"... I'm still not feeling it".

Sherlock crawls off him and the two laugh.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

Jack could not keep his hands of of Ianto. He could barely keeps his hands off of him before Gabriel left after bringing him back.

"Jack" Ianto giggles as the most perfect person in the whole universe kisses his neck. He moans as Jack sucks that specific spot they both loved during sex. Jack removes his mouth which results in a short whine from the ghost.

"I love you" Jack whispers. "I should have told you when I figured it out, but I was an idiot". He cups his face.

Ianto smiles. "I love you so much. But I have to ask: is it just going to be us for all of eternity?"

"Unless Gwen takes us up on that game of naked hide- and- go- seek". Ianto chuckles.

"Really, Babe".

"Yes, just us. Until the rest of time". Ianto smiles and kisses him again.

"I wanna do something we never had before" he whispers.

Jack smiles mischievously. "And what's that, Baby?"

"I want to make love".

Jack kisses him. "Can we make love by-?"

"Yes, we can play naked hide- and - go- seek" Ianto interrupts. He hurriedly kisses and undressed Jack.

"Slow down".

"No, life is short".

Jack pulls off. "Not for us!"

⭐⭐⭐⭐


End file.
